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Foot in Mouth Disease

Apparently, my severe case of foot in mouth disease, has been spread to Hubster. I’ve had this disease all of my life. As a little girl, I once confided to our neighbors across the street that my Mom had warned me that they were drug addicts (they probably were, but she never said that). That’s the first time I ever remember sticking my foot in my mouth. It happens frequently, even now. I am occasionally shocked by the combination of words that come from my mouth.

Hubster had a similar experience last week. There’s a new guy on his shift. He transferred from a nearby city’s police department following a media explosion over a few scandalous e-mails. Several of his co-workers were fired. Within the same week, his name appeared in the paper as a hero and as a villain. Hubster knew he sounded familiar when they met, so he asked him, “Where have I heard that name before?” The poor guy turned three shades of red before mumbling that he’d been in the paper a lot lately. Hubster felt like a heel.

Today, I stuck my foot in my mouth again, at Bri’s daycare. I was talking to the owner, Ms. Nancy. Bri was all decked out in her bathing suit for the pool, and since she’d just finished her lunch, she had a major pot belly. Ms. Nancy jokingly mentioned that she and Bri looked pretty similar in a bathing suit. I laughed. “Yeah, fat rolls are really stylish on a nine month old!” I didn’t even realize what I’d said until I reached the mini-van. D’oh! I ran back inside to apologize, knowing that I would probably just make it worse. Ms. Nancy handled the whole thing so gracefully. She didn’t seem ruffled a bit.

Maybe one day, I’ll learn to think before I talk.

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4 Responses

  1. That same disease runs in my dad’s family. 🙂 He has it, his brothers and sisters have it, their mom has it. It’s rather funny, actually, because they’re all so tactless but at the same time the most good-hearted, caring people in the world.

    My mom was really good about talking to my brother and me about thinking before we spoke when we were still pretty young. She made sure we were aware of the stick-foot-in-mouth tendency. I still do it sometimes, even though I’m pretty aware of it, and I know all too well the feeling of sinking dread as you realize you just accidentally insulted someone.

  2. Ah yes… I think we are all afflicted with this disease from time to time. I can think of a few times I did this myself.

  3. It is well known that I often only open my mouth to change feet! It is a terrible afliction! I often hear myself say things and then think “Oh my, I said that out load!”
    There are worse habits to have!
    XXX

  4. My mom and I were just talking about this! Of course we have a tendency to do it before knowing the whole story. Like someone will be talking about teenagers getting pregnant and I will make some comment about poor parenting only to realize that THEIR teenager is pregnant. Ooops!

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