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day 3/7: hypochondriac

Today began with intense pain. My right shoulder throbbed and my stomach ached so bad that I nearly fell out of bed at 3am trying to alleviate the pain. Over the course of the next four hours I rolled around and moaned. Then my alarm clock went off. By this time the pain had settled in my lower right abdomen. And it felt a lot like labor and a little bit like gas. So I called Officer Hubs, who was on duty and told him that I couldn’t walk. He told me to call in sick to work, which I did, and then he came to take the baby to daycare. When he got back and found me still in bed moaning, he insisted that we go to the emergency department. I dragged my feet, but in the end I let him take me. Did I mention that I was in labor for 27 hours on a Ptocin drip before I got an epidural? So I do at least have a reasonable knowledge of the ouchies and this was a 10 on my pain tolerance scale.my tummy

We were admitted very quickly, but had to wait f.o.r.e.v.e.r. Every time a health care person came into our room, they stopped with a deer in the headlights look and stared at me wide eyed. At one point a security guard stopped by and asked Hubs why he hadn’t signed in at the security desk. Each time Hubs had to explain that I was his wife and not under arrest. Something about being in the emergency department with a cop just gives people the wrong idea. Or it could have been my bedhead and lack of make-up. I must admit I did kind of look like a dangerous criminal.

officer hubs

In case you’re wondering, I did not have appendicitis or an ectopic pregnancy. After three hours of torture, including a GI cocktail (which sounds a lot yummier than it tastes) the final diagnosis was “abdominal pain.” Seriously. That’s what they put on my discharge papers. The doctor called it gastric spasms and acid reflux, but Hubs likes to say it was just “bad gas.” Sigh.


9 Responses

  1. OH jeez! What a pain in the abdomen! I hope that’s all it was! I hate diagnoses that still kind of leave you in the lurch!

  2. All that for a diagnosis of”abdominal pain”? What the flip?!
    Hope you are feeling better now. πŸ™‚

  3. awesome work er! i spent almost a whole night in the er once because i thought i had a pulmonary embolism…after a spiral ct and chest x-ray, my diagnosis was “chest pain.” i’m glad you are ok!

  4. So sorry you are not feeling well. I hope you feel better soon and hopefully hubby will not have to escort any of your family to the ER in uniform or otherwise again.

    Ugh, don’t even get me started with pathetic ERs. I just finished writing a three page formal grievance about our recent experience. My sister-in-law is a PA and told me it had to be done. They dropped the ball and I am lucky my baby only had a second febrile seizure at their expense.

  5. Bad gas…that’s pretty funny. Although I’m sure it wasn’t at the time! Glad it wasn’t something serious!

  6. I’m sorry you had such a hard time, but I have to admit that the image of you apparently under police escort does make me giggle.

  7. I was sure it would be kidney stones! I had those years ago, and I still shudder when I think of how bad it hurt. Crawl along the floor, seeing stars pain….glad you are OK! Seems kind of anticlimatic that they told you it was gas…..oy.

  8. I’m sorry to hear that you weren’t feeling well… but did your husband consider telling them you were a hooker needing medical treatment? Because that would’ve been hilarious. Well, hilarious to ME, maybe not so much to you.

  9. That sounds so painful. Much worse than “bad gas”. πŸ™‚ It is kind of funny to think of all those people thinking you were a criminal. But, I’m sorry you were in pain.

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