• ~Psalm 46:4-5~

    There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy dwelling places of the Most High. God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns.
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Get to Know Me

Hi, my name is Cindy! And I’m addicted to blogging.

(imaginary audience: “Hi Cindy!” )

If you have a few questions for me, or happen to be a glutton for punishment, then you’ve come to the right place. The following list of questions have been blurted out many times over the past few years. I’m not easily offended, so feel free to ask more in the space below if you think of any!

Why do you blog? Well, it’s cheaper than therapy, easier than scrapbooking and helps me remember the millions of moments, that I would surely forget if I didn’t write them down. Also, as I’ve mentioned before, I don’t consider this an online journal, because I do take creative license when I retell my life. So I may choose to embellish certain things, and I definitely omit lots of boring details.family portrait

How did you come up with your name? It’s taken from one of my favorite Bible verses. I strive to be a river that pleases God. Never stagnant, and always pouring myself into the lives of others.

There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God, the holy dwelling places of the Most High. God is in the midst of her, she will not be moved; God will help her when morning dawns. ~Psalm 46:4-5~

Before you start to think that I’m super spiritual, let me just say that I’m not! My idea of a quiet time these days falls somewhere between a twenty minute car ride with the Christian radio station on and a long hot shower with a Bible verse and a prayer. As an adult, especially a mom, I find myself on the go all the time. I’m just your average girl, trying to make everybody happy, and failing miserably. It’s such a blessing to know that God loves me with no strings attached and I can talk to Him even faster than I can text message (which isn’t saying much, but you get the idea, right?).
hubster's hand
What on earth were you thinking when you dropped out of medical school? I get this question a lot. Mostly from people who feel sorry for me. When I was eleven years old, I decided I wanted to be a doctor. It was my fairy tale dream job. I would save people’s lives on a daily basis and people would shiver with delight when I walked in the room. I was pre-med all through college and only wavered in my decision a little bit, right before taking the MCAT. Medical school turned out to be far more grueling than I’d ever imagined and it just demanded too much, in my opinion. I completed two years of medical school and had glowing recommendations from my advisors, but my heart was breaking. The final death blow to my medical career came when my Psychiatry resident, a 27 year old M.D. with a 6 month old son, teared up in the hospital because her baby had cried like she was a stranger when she picked him up from daycare. I knew in that moment, that medicine was not going to work for me.
bri at six months
How can you stand to work with high schoolers all day? I would go crazy! Well, by the end of the school year, I am pretty crazy but I still love my job. I get three months of paid vacation every year!! Teenagers are very blunt, but I’ve discovered that every job has a blunt person who knows how to throw a verbal punch. And besides, what other job let’s you say the pledge of allegiance in a bubble voice? Even on my hairy days, I have to admit that the view from the front of the room is usually way more entertaining than the other way around. The worst day teaching is still a lot better than the best day I spent working in the hospital.
photosynthesis equation
Did you freak out when your husband decided to be a police officer? Yes. He pestered me about it for two years, before I finally felt comfortable with the idea. When he applied for the position, I smugly thought that God would close that door quickly. I never imagined that I would actually be a cop’s wife!
daddy on duty
How has motherhood changed your life? Like any major milestone, it seems like everything changes and yet I’m still the same old person that I’ve always been. Sleep has become a lot more precious and taking pictures has become a lot more fun! Truthfully, I find that I strive to be the best version of myself in front of Bri. I don’t want her to pick up my bad habits, so I try to get rid of them. Also, I want to be the best mom that I can possibly be and sometimes that means taking some time to refresh myself. My Hubs really works hard to make sure that I get enough “me-time.” We tag-team it, as much as possible. He’s wonderful like that!
tutu cute
If you have more questions, feel free to leave a comment. I would love to answer them for you. You’re probably not going to ask me anything that my teenagers haven’t asked before! They told me once that I was pregnant with twins (while I was very much NOT pregnant but thanks for noticing my fourth trimester pouch). They’ve asked me all kinds of fun reproductive questions in Biology. Basically, you can’t ask me a stupid question.
Thanks for stopping by!

All posts and pages on this blog are the exclusive property of Citystreams; Copyright 2006-2009; All rights reserved.


5 Responses

  1. You tweeted we must be sisters. How about this for a small world my actual sister is married to a police officer too!


  2. Hi there,

    I just wanted to thank you for your post on med school. I cried, and cried and cried. I dropped out of med school 7 years ago at the end of my third year following the break up of my marriage. It was traumatic and I spent two years wandering around grieving from the loss of my two loves. I struggled through the first half of first year, but bounced back to earning high passes all through the last half and through second year Then third year hit and I hated it, and then my 3 month old marriage began to crumble right before my eyes. I realized that apart from being depressed because of my impending divorce, i was really very dissapointed with the whole medical system, the doctors and nurses and essentially medicine itself- i lean more towards a holistic organic approach to healing. I hated the fact that even some veteran doctors hated their work and were bitter and mostly hypocritical in their patient relations. I moved on since, earning a Masters in Public Health, but still , there isnt a day that goes by when I don’t feel like a failure. I recently remarried, but still feel that I have a problem living for others- my parents, who were overjoyed that their precious daughter was no longer a “divorcee” are now praying that by some miracle, I would go back to med school. I havent had a stable job in the past 7 years, mainly because i still carry the baggage and loose ends of my past. I have no closure. I need it though, hating to wake up everyday for the rest of my life thinking “what could have” or “should have”. Thank you for being there and being strong.

    Anna G.

  3. Thank you for sharing your story (I too am sitting here with a pile of kleenex). I am in my second year of med school. I decided to apply after becoming a physician assistant-I felt like it was what I should have done to begin with, and after much prayer my husband and I uprooted everything to start. Before starting I had a son who is the light of my life. I have felt that I have been able to maintain a good balance between family and school, but recently found out that I am pregnant with twins. I am struggling to understand God’s will. We knew we were supposed to do this, but I don’t see that there is any way to give my kids my best while being spread so thin. The thought of leaving three kids every morning and the hours that are ahead in internship and residency makes me want to vomit. I know that I can make it through(it wouldn’t be pretty), but at whose expense? How can I possibly give my 3 kids what is left over at the end of a 14 hour day and feel good about my contributions to their precious lives? I know that people do it and they say that these years don’t matter as much since they don’t remember (as long as they are being loved and cared for), but I have a hard time believing that. I appreciate your perspective and the way that you have taken time to open your life. Your daughter is a beauty!

    • You are NOT supposed to have a work-life balance in the medical profession as an MD. I thought you would have done your research and realized this already. Even I realized this way back as an undergrad and immediately changed my major. Your life revolves around your job in this industry. It isn’t for someone with a family or emotional commitments to others (grandma, uncle, brother, close friend, etc.).

  4. Dear Cindy,

    I am at the end of my third year in medical school and starting to think that maybe medicine is not for me. I didn’t pass my board for the third time now and i am struggling to have a balance life. As of now, I have too much student loan to quit….thus I keep on going….not knowing where I will end up….I have a question for you…is there any loan forgiveness for a medical student drop out? I was under a depression…..i don’t know what to do at this point other than trying every day to pass part 1 of the board.

    Thank you for your post.


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